Happy Independence Day !!

" Remember, remember, the 5th of November
The Gunpowder Treason and plot ;
I know of no reason why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot. "

This is the 60th year of our independence. India and its citizenry celebrate this occasion as only they can. Some of the significant achievements in honour of this special occasion are as follows

1) The government has finally found a way to legalize the issue of the office of profit. Which if I am not mistaken is what an MP seat is any way, so why the fuss you ask? What about the conflict of interest? What interest or rather who's interest? This all so silly really. We should send a petition to the president asking him to give his consent to the bill.

2) The bureaucracy has emphatically defended its inalienable right to disinformation, delay and obfuscation. The proposed neutering of the Right to Information act is supposedly to prevent "harassment " of bureaucrats.

3) In this our glorious 60th year of independence, we celebrate our right to free speech by the proposed introduction of a Broadcasting Services Regulation Bill, 2006. We had a teaser promo of the intended application of the bill in the recent blogspot ban.

4) Perhaps one of the most notable achievements is that the government will guarantee the equality of outcome. This perhaps is a first. We all have heard of equality of opportunity, but that is so passé. By proposing reservations in jobs, schools and colleges and providing guarantee for rural employment, the government will guarantee jobs and higher education, without the populace having to actually work for it.

5) In a stunning display of honesty and civic duty the tax paying public has "voluntarily" decided to submit a cash flow statement to the tax authorities from the next financial year onwards. This the public feels will help the government keep track of all the "cash" being spent by the tax paying public.

Henceforth that 25p paise coin that falls into the couch will result in a mad scramble to recover it. The fear that this measure will be used as a tool for further harassment has not crossed the mind of the public at all. Instead they have taken the motto of paying tax and holding their head high to heart.

It was also heard that the tax department was inundated with requests for the "new" simple saral form. It seems that the new complex "simple" form of 4 pages is a great hit with those filing returns. The tax paying public just cant wait for the day they have to fill out these forms. Last heard there were cues being formed at income tax offices around the country in order to collect these forms for fear that they might run out.

6) Lest there be any doubt that we as nation take attacks on our citizenry and sovereignty with the seriousness it deserves, the Prime Minister has promised to reflect on the relations with our friendly neighbour. The use of this ultimate weapon has struck terror in the hearts and minds of those who were responsible for the attack on the Mumbai trains.

This approach is expected to shame the perpetrators of the train blast into committing suicide. So far this approach has yielded uncertain results. In contrast some nations have reacted to similar situations by bombing the living daylights out of those who would dare attack them.

7) In this our 60th year we have truly laid claim to our "free"dom. All we want is (to get things for free) to be free. We don’t really expect much from our government except for free TV, free land, free power, free co-op loans, (virtually) free rice, etc. Welcome to the ultimate "mai baap" sarkaar.